Start dating after divorce men
"Diplomacy and negotiating skills are key." Being civil with your ex may encourage more flexibility in terms of custody, and potentially more time with your kids."If divorced spouses have a working relationship, they can agree to informally bypass some stipulations," Finley says.
"You don't want to be seen as an enemy or an antagonist but as a co-parent," says Arizona State University professor emeritus of psychology Sanford L. "I'm not saying that that will be easy, but everybody will be better off." Braver, co-author of Divorced Dads: Shattering the Myths, recommends that men consider conflict and anger management classes.
"Tell the woman you've just been through a tough divorce and that you're not ready for a committed relationship," he suggests.
"Acknowledge that it is not the right time for that." After a divorce, it's easy for guys to let themselves become isolated, especially if the ex gets custody of the kids. It can worsen feelings of depression, guilt, and loneliness, a potentially dangerous mix.
Call up old friends, join a softball team, a club, or a professional association. Just don't make the mistake of expecting your kids to be upbeat about it.
"Expand your social and professional network to avoid isolation." He also says that the aftermath of a divorce is great time to go back to school. "The last thing the kids want to see is parents getting involved with someone else," says Gordon E.